June 36th 1996/7
“PythOnline!” muttered Terry Gilliam derisively “Eric’s Fan Club more like.”
“Oo you bastard” I said “You’re all more than welcome to contribute. In fact I just spent a whole year working on it for absolutely nothing.”
“I like the Message Boards” said Jonesy, rather unflatteringly. In fact extremely unflatteringly since I don’t write those bits, you do. After some prodding he conceded it was a jolly good site and we should definitely keep going. I think the we means me.
“What I need” said Michael” is someone to say “Come up with six new pieces every month.” “Michael” I say “Come up with six new pieces every month.” Laughter. To reconcile me to earning nothing they very kindly offer to increase my percentage! Much Pythonic glee. “What exactly is 50% of fuck all?” I ask.
Just to reassure all the correspondents on Ask PythOnline who keep asking, I have not left, in fact I am very much involved in PythOnline making sure we stay up and online. No matter how hard I try and escape 7th Level employees keep me chained to that radiator. “Where’s the new fake open?”, “Where’s the New Stuff column for this week,” “What about next week?” They are merciless. I try telling them I have a life but they only laugh at me. “ Had a life buster, they chortle. This is the Internet. There is no escape.”
Yes it seems incredible but the Python one year lease expires and at midnight we shall be handing this web site over to the Chinese. (Ancient Hong Kong joke.)
It has been an amazing time, and I want to personally thank everybody who was involved. I need to single out for special mention Bob Ezrin and LeAnn, and all the wonderful people at 7th Level, particularly Jeanna Crawford, Robin Hinnen (our excellent resident graphic artist) and the untiring Hollis Leach. Some people came and went and have departed for other worlds and other webs, I am thinking especially of the amazing Steve Martino, but there’s Matt Lee who is sadly missed and honorable mentions should go to the back room boffins and web monkeys who have kept us online through the rough storms and occasional gales that blow around these parts.
Last of all I should like to thank me. Not many of you will have had the privilege of knowing me and working alongside me, but let me just tell you a finer and nicer and more upstanding human being you could never imagine. Oh Mike has his fans, and his appalling niceness that surrounds him like latex round a warm phallus, but I am the real thing. Even John Cleese has been known to admit that I have the finest feet. Terry Jones for too long has bathed in the warm glow that comes from standing beside me. Terry Gilliam can not get up in the morning without bowing in my general direction and thanking his own weird God that he was fortunate enough to meet me. And these are just a few of the Pythons whose lives have been enriched by knowing me and working alongside me. Modesty forbids I should say anything further about myself, but it would be wrong of me to let this occasion pass without a small word of thank you to myself for simply being me.
The future? Well who knows. There are big plans in the works. Some of these plans are almost five feet tall. We will be keeping you informed of these big plans, and even some very big big plans as Year Two progresses.
Happy holidays wherever you are.