Spamalot<\/em>.\u00a0 We throw a cow over the battlements which lands on Patsy, Arthur\u2019s page, every night.\u00a0\u00a0 And most matinees.\u00a0 (Occasionally they miss.)\u00a0 We even had a Cow song.\u00a0 We thought it would be funny if we gave the Cow a sad and touching farewell song as she went off to war.\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t.<\/p>\nCOW\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I\u2019m just a lonely cow who has a dream<\/p>\n
That each and every one of us is part of nature\u2019s scheme<\/p>\n
That somehow every single cow<\/p>\n
Can make a difference to just how<\/p>\n
This world is now today \u2013 it\u2019s true<\/p>\n
So here\u2019s my final moo!<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
It was just too sad.\u00a0\u00a0 You can\u2019t have an elegant Christian Dior cow singing a heartbreaking farewell and then being thrown over the battlements and expect to get a laugh.\u00a0\u00a0 We now care about the damn cow.\u00a0\u00a0 So here\u2019s what I learned:<\/p>\n
Cows aren\u2019t always funny.<\/strong><\/p>\nSo it got cut in Chicago.\u00a0 Not the first cow that got cut in Chicago, which is practically the center of the cow cutting world.\u00a0 They even have a Hamburger U. there, which shows just how weird and strange they are.<\/p>\n
So, let me see, cows\u2026 ah yes.\u00a0\u00a0 In Bavaria once with Monty Python we filmed the Bad Toltz Cattle Herd giving a performance of The Merchant of Venice<\/em>. We shot lots of cows in Shakespearian costume wandering around the field with Shakespearian sub-titles and lots of mooing.<\/p>\n\u201cWhat news on the Rialto Antonio?\u201d<\/p>\n
I played a very sincere German Theater critic: \u201cThe Merchant of Venice is a very difficult play for cows\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
Here\u2019s what I learned:<\/p>\n
Sometimes cows aren\u2019t even funny in German.<\/strong><\/p>\nSo now what have I got?\u00a0 Well frankly, nothing.\u00a0\u00a0 I have some chicken stories.\u00a0 An odd tale about a duck.\u00a0 What? <\/em>\u00a0\u00a0Say something about Glen?\u00a0\u00a0 Well, ok.\u00a0 Glen is a seven foot Scotsman with a wooden leg whom I met Frog Rolling on an Eskimo trip in Northern Greenland.\u00a0 We were sheltering in a sauna at a local bordello with an Icelandic babe called Splut\u2026 no I agree it\u2019s a hopeless and pathetic lie.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You see I haven\u2019t even met him.\u00a0 It\u2019s useless.\u00a0\u00a0 I\u2019m dismal as a Foreword writer.\u00a0 I\u2019ve got nothing to say.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t want this job, I didn’t ask for this job.\u00a0 I just wanted to be\u2026.a lumberjack!<\/p>\nSo why did I do it?\u00a0 Why did I take it on?\u00a0\u00a0 Well, honestly, I did it for the money.\u00a0 The Publishers came to me and said \u201cEric we will give you thirty thousand pounds if you will write a foreword\u2026.\u201d what?\u00a0\u00a0 They offered how much?\u00a0 Nothing?<\/em>\u00a0\u00a0 Jeeze.\u00a0\u00a0 Well that\u2019s it then.\u00a0\u00a0 I\u2019m out of here.\u00a0\u00a0 Let\u2019s face it, if you don\u2019t find these pictures funny on first sight no amount of forewords will persuade you otherwise.\u00a0\u00a0 So frankly enjoy.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n
Bibliography<\/em><\/h2>\nThe Cow through the Ages<\/p>\n
The Seven Ages of Spam<\/p>\n
Why the Cow almost became the symbol of America?<\/p>\n
The Cow in Literature with regard to Jane Austen and Dickens<\/p>\n
Fetchez La Vache.\u00a0\u00a0 A French Dairy Dictionary<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
For more of Glen’s work see:<\/p>\n
http:\/\/oneeyeland.com\/glenwexler\/member_home.php?pgrid=15902<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
A few years back Glen Wexler asked me to write a foreword for his very funny book of Cows.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 What I wrote is below.\u00a0 But a year later this picture appeared at my house unexpectedly….\u00a0 He had taken my joke and trumped it.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Read on and you’ll see how…. \u00a0 Glen Wexler\u00a0On location in Greenland. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-530","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-blog"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ericidle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/530","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ericidle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ericidle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ericidle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ericidle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=530"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.ericidle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/530\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":535,"href":"https:\/\/www.ericidle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/530\/revisions\/535"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ericidle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=530"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ericidle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=530"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ericidle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=530"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
![\"On](\"http:\/\/oneeyeland.com\/photo4\/conceptual\/one_eyeland_on_location_in_greenland_by_glen_wexler_39621.jpg\" "\\"On")
<\/a>\u00a0 Glen Wexler\u00a0On location in Greenland.<\/p>\n![\"Preflight](\"http:\/\/oneeyeland.com\/photo4\/conceptual\/one_eyeland_preflight_by_glen_wexler_49425.jpg\" "\\"Preflight\\"")
<\/a>\u00a0Fetchez la Vache!<\/p>\n